Reflections on the Integrated Salamin at Diwa ng Paglilingkod Training Course
Leadership training often promises new tools. What I found in SALDIWA 61 was something quieter and more lasting: a chance to look at how I lead before asking how I can lead better. Each day of the course built on the one before. It began with the self, moved through shared agreements and conflict, and arrived at values and the balance between kindness and firmness.
Starting with the Self: Mindfulness and Presence
The first lesson was simple but demanding: ground yourself in the present moment. Through sensory awareness and mindfulness techniques, I learned to step out of the reactive mental loops that take over when work gets stressful. A leader who can pause, regulate stress, and stay centered during demanding moments listens more attentively, thinks more clearly, and decides more calmly.
I also recognized that I cannot build this habit alone. I will need regular feedback and gentle reminders from my peers whenever I slip back into reactive thinking, along with chances to practice active listening in group discussions. I am grateful for the opportunity to pause and reflect, for a supportive group where experiences could be shared openly, and for the clarity I gained from practicing these sensory moments.
Making Agreements: Building a Safe Space
On the second day, we turned to agreements. Setting ground rules for myself was just as important as setting them for the group. They allow me to stay focused and reflective at the same time, and they hold me accountable to my own commitments. The group’s support and encouragement will help me deliver what is meant to be delivered.
What I valued most that day were the three things that made learning possible: agreements, commitment, and confidentiality. Together they created a safe space where people could be honest without fear.
Understanding Conflict
Conflict is unavoidable in any organization, and the third day made clear why. It often arises from differences in orientation and values, not from bad intent. If conflict comes from differing values, then resolving it requires understanding people, not just managing the disagreement.
I need to be well equipped with a range of appropriate strategies so that people can work together productively. To get there, I want to explore more techniques for resolving conflict and benchmark the best practices of colleagues who have handled it well. I am grateful for the conflict-resolution strategies we studied, and for colleagues and facilitators who generously shared their personal experiences.
Leading by Values
The fourth day asked a harder question: what guides my decisions when no one is watching? Values-based leadership grounds every decision, every team interaction, and every strategic goal in a set of core principles. It does not rely on immediate convenience, personal gain, or short-term profit.
To live this out, I need coaching and mentorship, ethical decision-making frameworks, and a regular assessment of my own leadership styles. I am grateful for the authentic sharing from fellow leaders, for the experienced facilitators and resource persons, and for the principles and values that gave me material to reflect on.
Kind and Firm: Fairness in Leadership
On the fifth day I realized that effective leadership should not be mistaken for being overly accommodating or lenient. Real leadership balances kindness with firmness, and it sets standards and guidelines that apply fairly to everyone. Being kind does not mean avoiding hard conversations, and being firm does not mean being harsh.
To keep growing, I will rely on reflective practice and a strong support system. I closed the day grateful for the generosity of those who shared their time and wisdom, for the group’s openness in sharing, and for the diversity that enriched our discussions.
Home Away from Home: Five Days in Brgy. Manlocboc, Aguilar, Pangasinan
Nothing in the classroom prepared me for the community immersion. For five days, I lived in Brgy. Manlocboc in Aguilar, Pangasinan, with a foster family: Lando and Jolina, a young couple who welcomed a stranger into their home as if I had always belonged there.
A life measured in what is enough. Their home was built of bamboo, with slatted floors, woven walls, and an open kitchen where sunlight came through the gaps in the walls. There was little in it by the standards I was used to, and I saw poverty up close. I saw how carefully a household stretches what it has. A meal was often a simple dish of vegetables with a bowl of rice, and nothing on the table was wasted. I had read about poverty in reports and statistics. Living inside it, even briefly, was different. It is not a number or a category. It is a young couple waking up each day to find a way to provide, with very little cushion if something goes wrong.
Generosity without condition. What struck me most was that Lando and Jolina never made me feel like a burden, even though sharing their food and space must have cost them more than I could see. They gave freely and without being asked. They shared what they had and never apologized for what they lacked. I came as a guest, and they treated me as family.
Mornings, coffee, and conversation. The moments I will keep longest are the ordinary ones. We shared morning coffee in the kitchen as the light filtered through the bamboo, and we ate together and talked about their work, their dreams, and the things they worry about. In those conversations I learned more about leadership than in many a seminar. I listened without hurrying to fix anything. I paid attention to what was said and what was left unsaid. This was the active listening we had practiced on Day 1, now with real stakes.
The classroom lessons, tested. Looking back, each lesson came alive in that household:
- Mindfulness and presence. Being fully present with the family, without my schedule, or even my title, was the best practice I could have had.
- Agreements and a safe space. Trust was built in the same way: by being honest, respectful, and keeping my word to people who had every reason to be wary of a visitor from the government.
- Conflict and differing values. Our daily lives were very different, and so were our assumptions. Understanding came when I stopped assuming and started asking.
- Values-based leadership. Seeing how little a family can live on, I had to ask whether the decisions I make in an office, about budgets, policies, and priorities, truly serve people like Lando and Jolina. Every plan I sign is, in the end, about families like theirs.
- Kind and firm. Compassion does not mean pity. Their dignity was never in question, and I want to lead in a way that supports people without making them feel small.
On the last day, saying goodbye was harder than I expected. There were tears and promises to keep in touch. I left a piece of my heart in Manlocboc. A place that was strange to me five days earlier now felt like home, and the people in it felt like family. I left humbled, grateful, and changed. The immersion reminded me why I serve. Public service is not about reports, titles, or compliance. It is about the families on the other side of every decision. Lando and Jolina did not have much, but they showed me what generosity, resilience, and dignity look like. I hope to repay that lesson through the work I do, with more attention, more compassion, and more urgency for those who have the least.
Carrying It Forward
Looking back on the training, the thread that ties it together is that leadership begins with self-awareness and is sustained by community. Presence helps me respond instead of react. Agreements create the trust that learning needs. Conflict strategies turn differences into collaboration. Values keep my decisions honest. Fairness balances compassion with accountability. And the immersion showed me whom all of it is for. SALDIWA 61 has changed me, and I am deeply grateful. Here’s to serving with more heart, more purpose, and more integrity. It did not hand me a formula. It gave me a way of reflecting, a circle of peers who will hold me to what I learned, a family in Pangasinan who taught me more than they know, and a clearer picture of the kind of leader-manager I want to be: grounded, fair, ethical, and committed to serving others.